Thursday, August 11, 2011

Say What?

These were all actual newspaper headlines.  It sort of validates our agonizing over every word we use when we write.  Maybe these peeps should have done the same.  Or maybe they knew exactly what they were doing...


Kicking Baby Considered to be Healthy

State Dinner Featured Cat, American Food

All Utah Condemned to Face Firing Squad

Woman Kicked by her Husband said to be Greatly Improved

London Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

Supreme Court Rules that Murderers shall not be Electrocuted Twice for the Same Crime

Deaf Mute Gets New Hearing in Killing

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Is There a Ring of Debris Around Uranus?

Prostitutes Appeal to Pope

Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn't Seen in Years

Man is Fatally Slain

Fifth Graders get to Grill Lions


How is your week going?  Is it just me or does it seem like everyone is on vacation??? 
Posted by Marsha Sigman at 9:57 AM
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15 comments:

  1. B.E. SandersonAugust 11, 2011 at 10:05 AM

    ROFL I see stuff like this all the time in the news feeds from CNN, FOX, ESPN... It kills me every time. I can't believe people are paid to write like that.

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  2. Luanne G. SmithAugust 11, 2011 at 2:23 PM

    Those are so funny. I see stuff like that too and it just cracks me up. I was reading a novel last night and saw a similarly written line about a man on a boat having a "stern" look in his eye. I wondered if the author saw the double meaning or not when she wrote that. :)

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  3. Jennifer HillierAugust 11, 2011 at 3:47 PM

    "Is There a Ring of Debris Around Uranus?" BWAHAHAHAHA

    Makes you wonder if anyone actually reads the headlines they print (or if they do, but have a twisted sense of humor!)

    It's vewwwy quiet around the interwebz these days. I'm not even here, I'm on vacation. See, this is me not being here...

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  4. Bryan RussellAugust 11, 2011 at 4:20 PM

    I'm back now! And I have the feeling that the Internet didn't even know I was gone. I shall have to punish it for that.

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  5. Golden EagleAugust 11, 2011 at 5:37 PM

    Have you heard the one "Mad Cow Injures Farmer With Axe"?

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  6. MunkAugust 11, 2011 at 6:59 PM

    I was fatally slain once.
    It's nothing to laugh at.

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  7. Laila KnightAugust 12, 2011 at 6:03 AM

    LOL. My favorite is the prostitutes appealing to the pope. What a riot. :)

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  8. trumpAugust 12, 2011 at 6:46 AM

    And i believe everyone of those stories, the media does not lie,lol. Richard from Amish Stories.

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  9. JenAugust 12, 2011 at 7:08 AM

    Brilliant! "Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers". It's harsh, but there are very few repeat offenders.

    I wonder how many of these were sneaky writers trying to get one past a frazzled editor.

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  10. j. littlejohnAugust 12, 2011 at 3:02 PM

    a lot of these are fascinatingly boring

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  11. PK HREZOAugust 13, 2011 at 8:21 AM

    lol... Um, yeah... seems like no one read these headlines aloud before printing them.
    Everyone's on vacation but me. We were saying the same things about the banks while we're trying to buy a new home. Everytime we call, the person we want is on vacation. ARGH!!

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  12. AnonymousAugust 13, 2011 at 10:37 AM

    Wow that is some list. My week seems wuite dull in comparison. LOL! :O)

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  13. AnonymousAugust 13, 2011 at 10:48 PM

    Hey! Welcome back!

    Oh. Yeah, I guess I'm late to the party. Again.

    Marsha, you came back in style! Funny stuff. I especially liked the "Utah to face firing squad."

    I trust you had a great vacation? Rested? Sarcasm vat filled to the brim? Sure hope so. Hehe.

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  14. deepsAugust 14, 2011 at 10:52 PM

    thats a great list. see, not everyone is on vacation :D

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  15. D. U. OkonkwoAugust 16, 2011 at 1:24 PM

    Whacky or what! I wish I was on vacation, but I'm just taking a break due to unforeseen circumstances :o)

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It helps to know I'm not just talking to myself.

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