Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Again With Short Letters

Dear Mulan,
If I watch this movie backwards, will it be the story of a decorated war hero who goes back home to get a sex change?
Sincerely, that is freakin’ awesome.

Dear Little Person,
Please accept my apology for throwing a sock at you and screaming "Dobby Be Free!!!"
Sincerely, margaritas are not my friend.

Dear burglars,
If I put 6 locks on my door and leave every other one unlocked, then you will constantly be trying to pick all the locks...
Sincerely, I’m smarter than you.

Dear World,
If women were in charge, there wouldn't be wars. Just a bunch of countries not speaking to each other.
Sincerely, a woman.

Dear alarm clock,
They might be hitting on you but they're sleeping with me.
Sincerely, blanket.

Dear lazy son,
Texting plus facebook does not equal textbook. Well, it does but not the way I meant. 
Sincerely, no one likes a smartass.


  1. You are so funny. Those are all great, but that alarm clock one is hilarious. And the locks one, and the textbook one....

  2. I agree with 'if women ruled the world" sentiment.

    And everyone I know likes a smartass. At least, that's what they tell me!

  3. Oh, hey, I had to come back to do a celebration victory dance over my takedown of Jennifer Hilliar for top commenter. I told you she was going down!! Mwahahahahaha. :PP (love you Jennifer).

    1. Can't spell her name right, but I do love her. :)))

  4. LOL. You're so crazy. In all fairness, Jennifer has been out of the country...but your name does look good there!!ha

    I'm just happy to have comments at all. And now I sound all fake humble, like it's just an honor to be nominated...

  5. love the women ruling the world. so true.

  6. Yeah, I could see that scenario if women were in charge.

  7. I love the burglars one! That's not crazy at all...that's BRILLIANT!

  8. This is so hilarious and true! Great post!

  9. I love these, and yes, women should rule the world. A woman rules my household; how hard would it be to rule the whole planet?

  10. This is a riot! Thanks for the laughs - I need all I can get. :-)

  11. Love this! I needed a laugh this morning.


It helps to know I'm not just talking to myself.