We know they are out there, even if we don't know the exact details of how they are played out. The biggest ones we suspect are the obvious:
Who Killed JFK?
Who is really behind Gas Prices?
McDonald's beef is injected with hormones causing all 12 year old girls to appear at least 19 years of age. (I may have started this rumor.)
Then there are the crazy ones:
The Moon Landing was faked.
Earth is ruled by Lizard people.
Michael and Janet Jackson are the same person.
I would like to include a few that I suspect but that are not as widely known.
1) When I plan to be at work early something keeps me from it. I suspect a conspiracy perpetuated by the alarm clock manufacturers.
2) Walmart emits a neurotoxin through its air conditioning vents so people spend more money on impulse buys. This is the only explanation for my purchases there.
3) Teenagers are replaced at the onset of puberty by a brooding, texting, smart mouth race of aliens that will someday take over the world.
Think about it. Share the knowledge.
Marsha,
ReplyDeleteI like your conspiracy theories they rock! I'm also of the opinion that some children's most amusing purpose in life is to purposely ignore your directions, thus making you feel like you're talking to a brick wall. Like when I tell my son something is in one direction and point in that direction he will go the completely opposite way. Since when was something I was pointing to on the RIGHT actually located on the left? LOL
Or that husbands snore on purpose to annoy their wives when they're trying to go to sleep. LOL
Bethany, do not even get me started on husbands.LOL Thats a week long series of posts.
ReplyDeleteWhen you cook for yourself, everything is perfect. When you cook for others, something always goes wrong.
ReplyDeleteNever hit the snooze button. It always sets off some kind of evil plan to ruin your day. Just get up when it rings and all will be well.
Marsha,
ReplyDeleteI love my husband dearly, but he does snore LOL. There have been times he didn't believe me and I threatened to tape him to prove it. LOL He told me that wasn't necessary.
Snoring is so evil! My husband keeps me up many a night. I love him. Really. The snoring is just WAY loud.
ReplyDeleteMarsha- this was a pretty funny list. Thanks.