Friday, November 11, 2011

More Very Short Letters

Dear Teachers,
Admit it; you only don't let us use Wikipedia because you're mad it wasn't around when you were a kid.
Sincerely, students.

Dear Students,
We know when you're texting.
Sincerely, No one just looks down at their crotch and smiles

Dear Buffy,
We have a new assignment for you. His name is Edward.
Sincerely, anonymous.

Dear Dora,
You're bilingual at age 4, and you seriously can't see the orange tree?!
Sincerely, It's right there!

Dear Men,
The first jockstrap was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. It took 100 years for you to realize that the brain is also important.
Sincerely, so that's why you need me to make your sandwich

Dear Taylor Swift,
If it is of any interest to you, Romeo and Juliet both kill themselves in the end.
Sincerely, Shakespeare

Dear Americans,
We totally agree with you about illegal immigration. Please allow us to show you to the nearest airport.
Sincerely, Native Americans

Dear Katy Perry,
I liked the kiss too.
Sincerely, Justin Bieber

Dear Harry,
It's a good thing we're not related; your name would be Harry Longbottom.
Sincerely, Neville

Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers,
If you do find one, what's your plan?
Sincerely, not very well thought out

Have a great weekend!!


  1. I always check behind the shower curtains for murderers. Of course, now I know if I find one and he's wearing a hockey mask, a kick in the groin isn't going to work anymore. Damn, I had a plan and everything until you told me about that jockstrap trivia.

  2. Haha, the first three were absolutely hilarious!
    <3 these!

  3. Great post, I really enjoyed this. Very imaginative.

  4. Laughing so hard! Just what I needed.

    I vote this should become a weekly feature!


It helps to know I'm not just talking to myself.